our lottery dream

what would i really like?
the honest truth…
that Bill and I would win a lottery jackpot tonite
that has been a dream/talk sequence that has worked its way 
so deep into our friendship and conversations 
for so many years now,  as we play our special numbers, 
and we know what they mean to each of us,
each of us plays 2 tickets so we can play each other’s numbers
on the chance that if either of us wins
we both win, and we will split the pot, although bill’s idea
of how we share with extended family, is a bit different than mine,
it doesn’t matter, because it is just the fact of the shared dream,
it's the friendship surrounding it that matters to us,
and would the money make either of our lives different at this point?
not as much as it might have 20 years ago, that is certain, 
but it would still give us options, 
and sometimes the energy of perceived options may be all we run on,
knowing we would still be on the twilight side of our lives,
but still have something to give this physical iteration of life,
and fully invested in the irony,
as we age, coming to terms with this life and appreciation for each breathe,
we sacrifice this body limb by limb, along with much of the memory,
but not our lottery dream